We are not powerless...

Everywhere I turn the aftermath of Sandy is abundantly clear-news and weather broadcasts, Facebook newsfeeds, tragic images, long gas -rationed lines and horrific stories from dear friends and family. We are all disheartened. We are all weakened by the reality we are faced with now.

I want to share my experience from this morning as I stood in line at Dunkin Donuts for my tea. I watched in disgust as a woman, frazzled and clearly exhausted, turned to the PSE&G worker in front of me and snapped "maybe if you f*ckers would stop taking coffee breaks, my family would have power back!"

He responded, with the gentlest voice, and said "ma'am I understand your frustration. I'm out there in the freezing cold to get people's power back on. I just NEED a hot coffee."

To this she responded "screw your hot coffee! My family has no heat no hot water for a week and you people don't even care"

Everyone stood there! Maybe too shocked at what was happening or maybe too numb to react. The silence seemed to last an eternity, but eventually he looked around her to the cashier and said "this woman's coffee is on me."

He then turned to leave the line, paused and said, at her but also at all of us as if he needed to justify his being there, "Just so you know I haven't seen my wife or my baby boy for almost a week because my house has no power and no heat. She had to take him to her mom in PA." As I looked at him I could almost see his lip quiver and the tears well in his eyes.

I reached my hand out and asked him to wait. I asked the cashier to give him his money back and a bagel. I told him I pray he's back home with his family soon.

He bowed his head a bit and thanked me.

I replied by clapping my hands and thanking him! The line of people around me responded by doing the same and I was proud. Not that I bought this worthy man a coffee but that the people around me were acknowledging how much he's given this week.

I suppose it can't be easy being a symbol of what's wrong...just try to remember the power company workers are not the problem. The loss of power, while awful, isn't even the problem. The problem is how we treat the world and the people in it.

Yes. We've seen devastation. We have endured great loss. But truth be told, we a little stronger too. Our patience has been tried. Our ability to adapt and overcome has been pushed to limits unknown to many. We learn in times like these that it isn't electricity that powers the human race. It is, or at least it should be, compassion and understanding. Generosity-true generosity...not that which is done for recognition, reward, personal benefit. Sacrifice- which by definition is difficult!

After all if we cannot stand together in the face of tragedy, we have already perished.

May all those recovering and rebuilding know my thoughts and prayers are with you!

Sometimes We All Need a Little Pick-Me-Up

Today Hartley House Candle Company introduces the first in its All Natural Aromatherapy line! These candles are made from 100% certified organic, GMO free soy wax, soy based dye for color shading and essential oils for scent that have been certified organic-free from all carriers and diluents. They have been harvested from the freshest materials within clean distilleries.

These candles offer the same luxurious scent as Hartley House Candle Company's other line but with added therapeutic qualities and commitment to green living.

Our first release is a Hartley House blended oil, Grapefruit & Bergamot. I have chosen these complimentary oils for the first release for many reasons. Grapefruit essential oil is a refreshing scent that evokes warm feelings and lifts a sour mood and Bergamot is an uplifting, confidence building scent. Grapefruit oil is also reported to aid in weight loss, curbing your desire to eat to suppress emotions. Blended together these citrus based oils will lift depression caused by unreleased tension and fatigue and help ease those bottled up negative emotions leaving you feeling refreshed, slightly energized and ready to face your day with confidence. For added ambiance and therapeutic qualities, these candles can be made with untreated wooden wicks :) To order, please visit Hartley House Candle Company at Facebook or my Etsy shop, Hartley House Candle Company on Etsy.

After the week we have faced here in the Northeast, we could all use a little pick-me-up! For me, watching the super storm and its aftermath unfold while friends and family were already dealing with their own personal tragedies has been emotionally draining. It is difficult to not feel powerless (no pun intended fur the millions left without power) in times like these.

So I light this candle in the face of the storm, both Sandy and everyone's inner storm, and I say let it lift our spirits above us and help guide us to brighter days.

I would also like to remind everyone to please contribute to the disaster relief and recovery efforts for Hurricane Sandy. There are many large charities, like The American Red Cross, and hundreds of collections/donations/shelter spots popping up across the tri state area.

Our Cities are in ruin, but we will rise up Jersey strong.


Give what you have. To someone, it may be better than you dare to think.
~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow~

May you find a sense of peace this week.  God Bless!

The Party Line?

It’s officially that time of the year.  You know the time when every social and media network is spewing the nauseating half truths of every politician and the quote-unquote public interest groups this side of the Atlantic Ocean.  I cannot turn the television on without at least five commercials from one party or the other berating the other candidate’s ethics, morals, political decisions, etc.  Who hasn’t paid their taxes? Who may not be a natural born citizen?

And just when I am so numbed by these inanities, I turn to Facebook for more light-hearted social niceties only to find, amidst Pinterest pins and picture postings, that my friends have engaged in the same word-driven warfare against their friends and rivals alike and I’m disheartened. 

Don’t get me wrong.  It is not that I don’t care about the state of our country.  I have more than half my life to live still and three wonderfully amazing children to raise and provide prosperous futures for.  So why the disheartened feeling at this time of the year?  Why get agitated at the television commercials and media postings?  Why nearly vomit at the news headlines and social media feeds?

Because I am smart enough to know that the American public knows just enough to be dangerous.  That regardless of Republican or Democrat, Red or Blue, liberal or conservative there is an unfortunate reality that Americans like me will face come Election Day.  Most of America will vote based on the half truths they’ve heard or read and believe to be accurate.  Most of America will vote based on the party line they tote regardless of whether that decision is in their own or their country’s best interest currently.  And, most of America will be disappointed in the subsequent years, whether “their” candidate won or lost, because they will most definitely be confronted with the one truth that will always remain constant; promises were made-promises were broken.  Sometimes these broken promises are not the sole fault of one man or woman, but we will still harness our disappointment towards his/her “success” in office and come next election day use this as the ammunition we fire at the future potential President.

At dinner with friends recently, I was tempted to join in on the Romney versus Obama discussion, but refused to get sucked into the political debating.  Truth be told, I am sure of only one thing. I do not have the answers for what our country needs and I’d rather not engage in a tug of war down the party line.  I’d rather leave my political stance to myself.  So instead I made light of the conversation, turned to my girlfriend and said “Speaking of party lines, the kids’ birthday party is going to be at Fairfield Farms again this year.”

We began our idle chitchat about the decorations and how much fun the kids all had playing in the hay and picking pumpkins.  I clamored away on my choice between gingham plaid tablecloths or burlap and the benefits to each in creating the perfect tablescape.  I vented over how difficult it was to find the right glassware at reasonable prices.  I was quite content with this new conversation, as was my girlfriend, however I could not help but notice her husband’s sneer at my change of topic.  Like many, his political opinions were ripe for the picking and he was eager to engage in the banter.  I found myself angered more and more by each comment he made in his discussion with my husband, most of them the same narrow-mindedness that turns my stomach as I listen to the political ads, etc. erupting at every turn. I half-heartedly made my way through the rest of the evening thoroughly saddened that a simple evening with friends, as rare as they are these days with most of us more than preoccupied with family time, was burdened with such heaviness.  I would much rather have argued over who had the better charades partner than political leadership choices.  I’m exhausted by all this election who-ha nonsense. I am no more ready today than I will be on Election Day regardless of how much more “information” I am fed.  In an unfortunate time where we are constantly connected to our phones, iPads/iPods, etc., where work consumes the majority of our lives and  social interaction becomes increasingly difficult to plan because of everyone’s busy schedules,  it would have been nice if the adults could have put away not only their electronics but also their politics.  Maybe I have it wrong, but I so much more enjoy a good game night than a political party debate.  I think it brings us closer (even if I am extremely competitive- yes I admit it) and reminds us of the value of friendship.  Friendships are after all what get us through the difficult times…

<insert shameless plug...one of my next posts will be all about Matthew & Meghan's adorable party!>